Philadelphia 76ers and Marvel: The Avengers as Sixers

(Marvel via Getty Images)
(Marvel via Getty Images) /
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(Disney XD via Getty Images)
(Disney XD via Getty Images) /

Thor: Joel Embiid

The most powerful Avenger. Well, maybe. Is Captain Marvel an Avenger now? Yeah, sorta, I guess. Anywho, Thor is a literal god. The god of thunder in Norse mythology, and the same iconic being in the MCU. Joel Embiid fits that status.

As Thor wields his mighty hammer, Embiid wields his 7-foot-2 frame, plowing through smaller defenders inside and punishing those ill-fated enough to guard him. It’s not all power, though. Both Thor and Embiid have some finesse — one can summon the bifrost and send Stormbreaker on a boomeranging, monster-killing spin. Embiid can cook slower defenders in the mid-range and knock down the occasional 3.

Embiid has captured the spirit of Philadelphia, much the same as Thor has captured the spirit of Asgard in the past. A bold, unrelenting leader. Both have had their fitness questioned in the past — perhaps a few Shirley Temples, or a few beers too many — but in the end, they always come through.

Thor –> Embiid. The Dark Elves –> An endless cycle of depressing mediocrity. Creeping from the darkest corners of the universe, those elves hated all things good and light. Before Embiid, things were dark in Philadelphia. But as Thor saved Natalie Portman (and, you know, Earth), Embiid saved the City of Brotherly Love.